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2007-07-07 - seven seven oh seven

My job is so different from what I was doing, it's starting to fuck with my head sometimes. Other times, I really manage to pull it all together. Transitioning to a corporate environment is really, really weird inside my head. I haven't found anyone who relates to this mental phenomenon, except for maybe Derrick who left me a comment, that made me think that maybe you sort-of understood. Am I right? (You said, Ah, the joys of gainful employment...)

Does anyone else know what I'm talking about?

Oi.

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I leave Monday for New York. I won't get back until Thursday. I don't know exactly what I'll be doing/training for. When I asked my boss, she didn't really tell me anything. Huh? I know I'll be learning computer stuff. I hope I'm not perceived as an idiot, which is how I've been feeling lately. Friday wasn't so bad, though. I bucked up, and it was a good day. Thursday I cried all the way home. I was so glad Amor had the day off, because I got home (after six) and just collapsed in his arms and cried some more. It was just a release, a release of tears.

When I first became a clinical dietitian, 4+ years ago, I had the exact same reaction to my new job. It's mental growing pains. I grow through my tears. I wouldn't dream of crying at work, though. That would be a death sentence. Fuck that.

I just have to pull through it, and not give up. I try to stay focused on the positive and maintain proper hydration.

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I went to yoga today - I hadn't been in thirteen days! It felt really good, and I'm going again tomorrow. I haven't really been working out that much, doing turbo jam twice a week, but I haven't gained any weight. I think I still have some muscle mass left over from the MS15O, which burns calories when I'm doing nothing. (I sit a lot at my new job.) This is good!

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Amor and I have the afternoon together tomorrow, after he gets off work, then I don't see him for four days. I am not liking this part of my new job, being away from him for so long. But it is cool going to places I've never been before.

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My husband pointed out an interesting fact. Today, being a lucky day 7/7/07, is within a week of an unlucky day, Friday the 13th.

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