S acorn's diary
newest
archives
profile
notes
email
design
thebeloved
host
thecity
100
2009-09-29 - Things I miss

No pictures today.

So we went to this dinner party Sunday night (one of my bike friends, her chef/wine dude hubby was cooking) and he was kinda angry a bit of the time, and we drank so much and I ended up taking a sort-of hit off a gross cigar because I was so wasted and ended up puking my guts out! I puked there at her house and when we got home, it was terrible.

There were 2 other couples there, plus the host-couple, so there were 8 of us total. I mean, it would have been a good dinner, I just felt like there was way too much food offered us, way too much alcohol, my friend's hubby kept getting kinda pissy, and then we went outside afterwards to hang out, it was hot, and the cigar just pushed me over the edge.

Ok, that's gross!

Anyway, during the conversations of the night, we all concluded that Acorn needs more Acorn time. See, in my previous unsuccessful relationship, my significant other worked nights all the time, so pretty much every evening and every weekend I had completely to myself. Now? It's the total opposite. I get home from work and hang out with my man, and weekends we are inseparable. But all that stuff I used to do when I was alone (play guitar, listen to music, paint, embroider, write on Diaryland, ride my bike...) I just don't do anymore, and I don't like it! I'm trying not to be too simplistic, but really that's all there is to it. It's not the fact that I hate hanging out with my man, that's great. I just wish there were more hours in the day so I could to all that stuff I used to do and enjoy when I was alone, and that helped me channel my creative energies. But since we all know there aren't extra hours in the day, well, I guess time with the boyfriend is just going to have to suffer.

Does that make me a bad girlfriend? I don't think so... I care about myself too much to let my happiness slip. And I don't want that to happen. I want to continue on this plane that I'm on, I just happen to have enough cool clairvoyance at this point in my life, we hope.

The new National Geo came in today. It's got a picture of Redwood trees on the front and some dude is climbing it.

Then I was watching PBS off an on yesterday (I had the day off and went to the dealership to get some minor things fixed on my new car) and it had this special on U.S. Parks. One of the quotes was that being around nature can help you forget your woes, it helps relax you. Does being around my cat count as being around Nature? I think it does, kinda. I don't have any plants - I used to be a HUGE plant person... now I don't even have a balcony/porch to grow anything on. And if we had plants, the cats would eat them or mess them up somehow.

Man! So what *am* I doing for me lately? Well, I've put in a lot of work towards our apartment, you know, decorating, being creative with wall hanging things. And I've been cooking a little bit more.

And we've been going to a lot of concerts lately, I mean, a LOT.

Anyway, I hadn't been sick in like over a year, but then about 4 weeks ago I got some upper respiratory/sinus stuff, 2 weeks after that it went into my lungs, and I've been coughing for 2+ weeks. It's not so bad now. I got on antibiotics for 7 days, I didn't drink alcohol for about 2 weeks. I didn't have to miss any work.

Ah, my boyfriend...

When he holds me in his arms, it's like a peace I've never felt. Or one I used to dream about when I was a girl, before I ever knew what love was, what I imagined love would be like. Someone lifting me into the clouds in a heart-pounding, dizzying swoop. Well, that's what it's like.

And I sleep so good now. I live with such a peace in my heart, well, more so than the maelstrom that used to stir within my brain with such frenzy. He holds me in his arms, I take a deep breath in, I breathe him in, and he does the same with me.

They say that living with a pet can do wonders for your personal constitution. I come home from work and scoop my kitty up into my arms and she purrs and meows and rolls over on her back and wants me to rub her tummy. She's so awesome. Every morning I wake up and she's in my arms.

But sometimes she's a turd and won't let me sleep in on weekends.

OK, that's all for now.
1 (comments turned off. leave me a note?)

go - go