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2011-08-12 - death to Acorn

This whole week was that conference my department headed up, I gave part of an hour and a half presentation. We had 140 people come down from all over the US for 4 days, I was one of the main planners/organizers. Tired does not begin to describe my state.

I am sick. A summer time cold from all the stress from moving and the conference. Lovely. I have to mouth-breathe because my nose and sinuses are all clogged. And I have post-nasal drip. I have been taking my vitamins, and eating lots of fruits and veggies. It should get knocked down soon. I've got a big ride in 2 weeks with my older sister, so I have to train a bit. I will ride Sunday, not Saturday. Tomorrow I plan on organizing the apartment.

The new apartment:
It's still a major wreck! I've done ZERO organizing the past 2 weeks we've been here. Can you believe we've been here 2 weeks?!?

And I haven't worked out in 2 weeks, too! I feel like total crap! Well, I take that back. I rode around on my bike last Saturday night.

The kitties still love their new home. I'm trying to get them used to the balcony, so I've been opening the door in the mornings, and letting them go in and out as they please while I'm getting ready for work.

Ugh, I'm a fucking snot machine!

Also, there's been major stress and fighting between me and Richard with all the stress from moving. And we still don't have TV or Internet. We've got like, 3 Breaking Bads to watch. I like that show a lot. But honestly, I'm enjoying the no TV. Richard's at a client, and I'm by myself with the kitties about to read the Stand some more (I'm on page 331), and it's so peaceful and quiet. When Richard's around, he's like a tornado sometimes! Yeah, but he can chill, too. Anyway, so the fighting all came to a head last night, but not in an angry explosive way at all, we communicated over text yesterday afternoon and made some major progress. I now understand more of his crazy, and he understands mine. We're not fucking perfect, and I want to bolt sometimes. FUCK IT ALL, is what I say in my mind. Not good. But I was starting to feel emotionally abused with the yelling and name-calling during fights. Not good. It's very reminiscent of my dad. Ugh, how I hate him. He's still leaving me messages that I need to go to rehab. The only drug I do is alcohol. And bike.

So back to me and Richard. Yeah, so I know we've both been under a great amount of stress lately. After we texted yesterday, I got home from work and got some Pho. It was delicious, very vegetable-y. We got home and got in bed and talked some more. No anger, it was nice. But I'm still kinda not right because I feel hurt still, and I'm sick, and I'm exhausted, and I feel fat because I haven't worked out in 2 weeks, and Richard's exhausted, and tired. I don't know what I'm saying here. I wish I had the standard Acorn "Everything's GREAT!!" entry for you today. But I don't. Today you get the Acorn entry where she's disheartened and beaten down by LIFE.

Did I tell you that my new kitchen has more cabinet space? It does. I can't wait to organize it tomorrow. I also need to do the dining area (we gave away Richard's table + chairs on Craigslist), it's going to be my work-out area. I'm never going to have to move furniture again! Richard was so cool about it, converting the dining area to Acorn Space. Then the sofa and chair, the DVD tower/shelf thing. The bathrooms. The bikes, oh my I have to put up the insane bike rack. I'll get started tomorrow. Tomorrow.

Tonight I'm death. I'm so weakened by my malaise. I need a good night's sleep desperately.

Gonna go read now.

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