15 years ago I...
1. was 17 years old
2. met my future husband, only wouldn't realize this until 7 years later
3. broke up with my bf of two years who had hit me in the face for cheating on him, then got back together with him 2 years later
4. had never smoked marijuana
5. didn't really realize I was brown

10 years ago I...
1. was 22 years old, it was 1997
2. would graduate with my BS in a year
3. had a nightmare about Newt Gingrich that he was my father, and was horrifyingly evil towards me and my sisters
4. was living in a house with my bestfriend, Anneliese - she had just given birth to daughter #1
5. was smoking lots and lots of marijuana

5 years ago I...
1. was 27 years old
2. thought I would never go back to grad school to finish my MS degree
3. got married
4. was living in San Antonio next door to my parents with my new husband, which started me on my journey to crazy
5. weighed 20 pounds more than I do now, I was FAT!

2 years ago I...
1. was 30 years old
2. was seeing a shrink, I was pretty crazy because of grad school, among other things
3. was drinking copious amounts of alcohol and getting into bar fights
4. was going to Numbers a lot on Friday nights
5. didn't appreciate my husband's undying love for me

1 year ago I...
1. was 31 years old
2. finished the first draft of my pro-paper
3. really thought I was going to slash the tires of my professor's car, burn down his house with him in it, throw dog shit all over his office, then set it on fire, and smash his face in with my fists
4. got pregnant and then lost our baby after carrying her for only 4 weeks - I felt weird this past mother's day, am I a mother? (You don't have to really answer that.)
5. had a dream about welding kittens

Yesterday I...
1. had a lunch date with my husband
2. nearly died during my Bikram yoga class
3. picked a scab off my ankle
4. talked to my mom on the phone, she wanted to know how my new job was and when my marathon was (I don't have any marathons in my future - I think there was some miscommunication between me, her, and a friend of hers)
5. had a dream my husband was sending me cell-phone pictures of his huge cock

Today I...
1. had BBQ and Lonestars with Francis amidst great conversation
2. looked at myself naked in the mirror and was pleased
3. took the recycling
4. drank caffeine
5. watched This Week with George Stephanopoulos

Tomorrow I will...
1. get up at 5:45 a.m.
2. commute to work with the sun at my back
3. get to attend a business dinner at a fancy restaurant at the expense of my employeer

Five Items I have Brand Loyalty To
1. beer - St. Arnold
2. toothpaste - Crest
3. juicer - Jack Lulane Power Juicer
4. facial moisturizer - Oil of Olay
5. hair care products - Garnier Fructis

Five Snacks I Enjoy
1. Grapes
2. Cucumbers
3. Rices cakes with Nutella
4. Bananas
5. Honey Maid cinnamon graham crackers

Five Songs I Know The Words To Even Without The Lyrics
1. All her favorite fruit - Camper van Beethoven
2. Down in it - NiN
3. She don't use jelly - The Flaming Lips
4. She said she said - the Beatles
5. Daisies of the galaxy - Eels

Five Games I Like
1. Truth or dare
2. Balderdash
3. Monopoly
4. Uno
5. Pictionary

Five Albums That Changed My Life
1. 13 Songs - Fugazi
2. Ritual de lo Habitual - Jane's Addiction
3. Shepherd Moons - Enya
4. Disintegration - the Cure
5. Pretty Hate Machine - NiN

Five Things I Can't Live Without
1. water
2. my husband's love
3. exercise
4. music
5. air conditioning

Five Things I would do with one thousand dollars
1. pay off school loans
2. pay off credit cards
3. pay off car loans
4. go on one of these.
5. save it in the bank

Top Five Guilty Pleasures
1. Bikram yoga classes (they're expensive)
2. buying cds
3. good beer
4. nice restaurants
5. fitness water

Top Five Locations I�d Like To Run Away To
1. South of France
2. a secluded beach in Oaxaca
3. Appalachian Mountains (specifically the Smoky Mountains)
4. Brugges
5. Johnny Depp's lap

Five Things I�d Never Wear
1. perfume
2. a jock strap
3. fake nails
4. fur - it's just tacky
5. those large, ugly, plastic, clog shoes that everyone seems to be wearing

Five People Who Are Currently On My Bad Side
1. Newt Gingrich
2. the dude at Fiesta who always throws my produce in the bag, bruising it. Little fucker.
3. an ex-coworker who shall remain nameless
4. always my father
5. my ex-obgyn who told me (after the event) that I didn't have to have kids if I didn't want to. WTF? I hate her.

Five Bad Habits I Have Are...
1. I'm a bad listener
2. listening to music too loud in my car
3. I never lock the car door when I ride with my husband (he doesn't have automatic locks)
4. I put my dirty dishes in the sink instead of the dishwasher
5. I leave lights on all over the apartment when I'm not using them

Five TV shows I like
1. Lost
2. Little House on the Prarie
3. The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson
4. America's Test Kitchen
5. Star Trek

5:45 p.m. Sunday

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